Hello Darkness! The Official Blog of Helen Keller

The Comment Corner Proudly Presents: Looking for Meaning in Duran Duran Lyrics

First up, a small little ditty from their 1982 album Rio, the one with the fucked up geisha cover, none other than the title track Rio!

Rio

Moving on the floor now babe youre a bird of paradise
Cherry ice cream smile I suppose its very nice
With a step to your left and a flick to the right
You catch the mirror way out west
You know youre something special and you look like youre the best.

What the fuck is Simon Lebon talking about here? It starts off with lyrics about a bird of paradise but it's on the floor. Is he going on about an Emperor Penguin? Instead of waxing about its cherry ice cream smile, which sounds like what a fat-kid has on his face after raiding the fridge at midnight, maybe he should figure out why the bird is on the floor. Is it hungry? Retarded? Did Simon boot the fucking thing down? We're left to ponder this before he moves on to describe his preferred masturbation technique, a step to his left and a flick to the right, he catches it on a mirror. Kinky British bastard. Maybe now we have an idea why the Emperor Penguin is pressed close to the floor with small bits of Simon Lebon flying around the room.

Her name is rio and she dances on the sand
Just like that river twisting through a dustly land
And when she shines she really shows you all she can
Oh rio rio dancer across the rio grande

Here's the chorus. It's a shitty simile with an abstract metaphor about her shining. Perhaps she hasn't stepped to the left and flicked to the right yet to catch the mirror?

Ive seen you on the beach and Ive seen you on tv
Two of a billion stars, it means so much to me -
Like a birthday or a pretty view
But then Im sure that you know its just for you.

Now that we've left the cummy Emperor Penguin behind, Simon Lebon reveals his true intentions; relentless stalking replete with ample justification. After viewing her from a far, he simpy announces that she's like a birthday or a pretty view, cementing an even worse reason for unrequieted love than John Hinkley. At least he's sure that she knows it's just for her. And thanks to the miracle of audio-tapes, so too do the police.

Hey now (wow), look at that.
Did he nearly run you down?
At the end of the drive, the lawmen arrive,
You make me feel alive, alive, alive
Ill take my chance, cause luck is on my side
I tell you something, I know what youre thinking
I tell you something, I know what youre thinking

Now Simon has left behind the shackles of decency and is contemplating hitting the object of his love (hopefully not the penguin) with his car. The lawmen, the police officers contemplating his creepy unsolicited taped phone-calls, arrive too late to save her from crazed Simon Lebon. He'll tell you something, he knows what you're thinking. And provided he knows she's thinking, "Jesus Fucking Christ, please just leave me the hell alone" he's right on the money. However, he's also officially departed from reason as he'll take chances 'cause luck is on his side. So too did Lee Harvey Oswald, who may have been humming Rio before the song was even written.

Her name is rio and she dont need to understand
And I might find her it Im looking like I can
Oh rio rio hear them shout across the land
From mountains in the north down to the rio grande

Rio has now run the fuck away from civilization to escape the depravity of Duran Duran. Simon Lebon, always vigilant when it comes to haunting women into fearful escape, proceeds to soldier on in his quest to reduce the fair Rio to a shambling mess. She don't need to understand not only why this has befallen her, but why too it happens in an AABA quartet rhyming scheme.

All in all, a catchy tune with depraved lyrics. An '80's Dragula if you will.

A View to a Kill

Ahh yes. A View to a Kill. Sharp synthesizer sounds, pounding chorus and Roger Moore’s last turn as 007 versus Christopher Walkin turning in a wonderful psycho with his equally psycho confidant, May Day, played by none other than equally crazy Grace Jones. Hopefully, there won’t be anything too creepy in this song…

Meeting you, with a view to a kill
Face to face in secret places, feel the chill.
Night fall covers me, but you know the plans Im making,
Still oversea, could it be the whole world opening wide
A sacred why? , a mystery gaping inside
The weekends why?

Oooh, this starts off rather sexy-like. Face to face in secret places…kinky. The whole world opening wide…oooh…um…sure. A sacred why? Hold on there Simon, you’re killing the mood a bit here. A mystery gaping inside? It could be a diaphragm, slow down there trigger.

Until we dance into the fire

Woah. What the fuck? Let’s keep our dancing in front of the fire, could we?

That fatal kiss is all we need

Now this is starting to get a little bit creepy. I don’t need a fatal kiss. Dancing NOT in the fire is romantic enough.

Dance into the fire,

Shit, we’re back in the fucking fire.

To fatal sounds of broken dreams

Yeah, my broken dream was to survive the night without crippling third degree burns or loss of limbs. Pyro Clumsyfoot here though has other plans. Second date? Jebus Rice!

Dance into the fire,

I just got the last fire put out you son of a bitch! Watch where the fuck you’re dancing, asshole klutz.

That fatal kiss is all we need

And here comes that fatal kiss! You’ve tried to set fire to me three times already and now you’re back to the kiss of death. Calm the fuck down.

Dance into the fire.....

Okay, just a hint, any chick listening is now definitely NOT turned on and is probably packing her shit and getting ready to go.

Choice for you, is the view to a kill
Between the shades, assassination standing still.
The first crystal tears, fall as snowflakes on your body
First time in years, to drench you skin with lovers rosy stain
A chance to find the phoenix for the flame,
A chance to die..

Choice for me? Dude, I’m hitting the elevator. My Sketchers are burned and I’m tired. Assassination standing still? Are you retarded? You danced me into the flames a couple of times there. I counted. Snowflakes on my body? I need aloe vera you pyromaniacal dipshit! Those aren’t crystal tears, they’re cooked body fluids weeping out of the burns. Yes, drench the skin with some ice, not a lover’s rosy stain. Well, fuck, I guess you’re bleeding pretty bad too. A chance to find the phoenix for the flame? Uh-oh, I get pretty goddamn nervous with the fire imagery. A chance to die? Oh fuck. Let me guess we’re going to dance into the fire?

But can we dance, into the fire?

Yup. I called it. Didn’t need a crystal ball for that one. And the answer is no. I think I pretty much found all the meaning I’m going to in this one there Himmler. Enjoy your freaky burnt-foot dancing and diptheria kisses or whatever the hell else turns you on, beating the fuck out of plants or drop kicking car parts through hospital windows or drinking Barbicide right out of the comb holder.

There you have it folks, two Duran Duran songs examined, little to no meaning found, but a whole lot of pain to be had. Stay tuned to the Comment Corner for more “Looking for Meaning in Duran Duran lyrics.”