Hester's Head

The ship's company knew that we would be having our line crossing ceremony on the 20th. After leaving Singapore we would have a daily informative pipe from King Neptune's herald keeping us up-to-date and attempting to throw some fear into the unclean tadpoles. Davy Jones came onboard the evening before the ceremony in order to inspect the Subbie guard of all the Sub-Lieutenants (I think they are called Lieutenants in the Army and Air Force) with a Lieutenant (Army/AF Captain) in charge of them. They were mustered and fallen in on the focsle dressed in toga/whatever unsuitable dress they could find. All unclean tadpole officers had to come forward for inspection as well. Davy Jones inspected the ranks assisted by his herald. After addressing the Commanding Officer, who welcomed him onboard, he carried on with his inspection. It was nearing sunset so things were getting dark fast. All tadpoles were piped to muster on the focsle as well to witness the events while the trusted Shellbacks mustered on the bridge and bridge top to maintain a safe distance. You can see some pictures at the HMCS Ottawa website: http://www.navy.forces.gc.ca/ottawa/gal ... lery_e.asp There is even a couple pictures that I took. The tadpole officers who tried to get out of the inspection were lathered with some... unidentified goop. There is plenty of goop to go around that night and the next day as well. Some of his mermaids and some of his bears and police also accompanied Davy Jones. You can't be too safe in the midst of all those tadpoles. After the inspection and some parley with the CO, Davy Jones departed, leaving a watery surprise for the tadpoles. Decks 2 and 3 were out of bounds to tadpoles that night so they took matters into their own hands if they ventured out. But with the tadpoles outnumbering the shellbacks four to one, things were often turned and shellbacks were the ones who had to exercise caution. There's no need to talk about that any further.
King Neptune was scheduled to come aboard at 9 the next morning so the shellbacks had to get up early to have breakfast and then prepare the tadpole's breakfast. I will tell you that the tadpole breakfast contained lots of vibrant food colouring. It was also made the night before so it was quite cold. Check the pictures again; you can see that it took considerable effort for some to finish their breakfast. Misbehave in any way and you would receive a double helping. Also, don't wear your good clothes. Things would only get uglier as the morning wore on. King Neptune finally arrived with his full court, included his judge, doctor, nurse, barbers, baby, herald, bugler, more mermaids, bears and police, as well as Davy Jones. One by one the tadpoles were called before King Neptune. The doctor and the nurse popped a pill in their mouth (don't ask - I remember spitting mine out and throwing it over the side when I did it in '96), they had to kiss a fish (worse than it sounds - it was something gray and strange from Singapore - the one I had to kiss in '96 had been left in a pan on the hangar top for a couple days) and then they were shaved. Don't ask what the shave lotion was either. It at least covered their head and usually covered their face and ran over the shoulders and chest. The barbers had their way with them before they were rather unceremoniously dunked in the brine. The bears helped with the dunking as well as helping them climb out of the pool. There was a stepladder there for that purpose. After being dunked they were declared clean (uh huh, yeah right. Did you see what that water looked like when the goop was washed off?) And were now trusted shellbacks. Some of the gunk was so persistent that it did not come off in the pool so there was a fire hose rigged on the quarterdeck to help the people hose themselves off before they went back inside the ship. I walked around taking some pictures, but let me tell you about the smell.... No, I don't want to. Again, those who misbehaved (or were members of the Tadpole Liberation Army) would get sent to the back of the line after being lathered by the barbers. They would have to stand in line with the crap covering their faces. Did I mention it was very hot out too? We were on the equator of course. After the ceremony was complete things were quiet for a couple hours before we went to cleaning stations. The ship was a bit more than a mess but we got it cleaned up and carried on. It would seem that the task group crossed the line solely for the purpose of crossing the line. Later that afternoon we had already crossed the line again and were heading back toward India. I should note that this ceremony was completely voluntary - those that did not want to participate didn't have to. There were almost 150 tadpoles and only five of them chose not to participate. But those who don't go before King Neptune's court do not receive their crossing the line certificate or card. Trust me, when you get a card you hang on to it. You have to produce it as proof that you've crossed the line and that you are a shellback. If you lose your card, or forget it, you have to suffer the indignity of being a tadpole again as well as the ridicule of your shipmates. They show very little mercy. Forget your card and you will get even less.
This ceremony goes so far back that its origin is lost. You can google it, I think what we do today hasn't changed much over the last 300 years, but the ceremony has been around in some form for over 2 or 3000 years. I'm happy to say that I've entered King Neptune's realm, appeared before his court and am now a trusted shellback. I have four cards now and hang on tight to all of them. I even bring them all to sea with me. I ain't no stinkin' tadpole.