Istanbul's blog

**Posted:** Fri Jan 19, 2007 12:12 pm

EmmyLou wants to send me a womanuscript she has just completed. I think that is what they call a manuscript when each page is dipped in perfume. 'Essence of Skin' is her favourite while I prefer 'Sultry Lilac'. Emmylou was a big shot in the perfume industry in her youth. She was chief sniffer in the testing department. With one quick underarm sniff she could analyse your dietary intake for the previous 48 hours. 'Essence of Skin' worked by blocking the sweat pores while 'Essence of Lilac' mixed with the sweat, pried it from the body and deposited the mixture on the sleeves of the shirt or blouse.
Fresh air would dilute the scent and Sunlight with bleach would eventually remove any stains.

This novel was EmmyLou's first book and wanted me to do a review. She claimed I was the man for the job as she knew I could read her like a book. In our intimate moments her pet name for me was Book Worm. I guess she felt she had to emphasize my intellectual side.

In preparation of this exiting adventure I looked for some simple book reviewing rules and stamped them on the back of my hand for quick reference.

1.Whats the Book's Purpose?

2. What did the author hope to accomplish?

3. The Book's Title
.. is the title ambidextrous? (Typo or hando?)

4. What are the author's main ideas?

EmmyLou already mentioned the book's purpose. To make lots of money and possibly used as a movie script for J-Lo and Brad Pitt.

The Book's title was "The lost Virgins".
It is supposed to be a really happy story about alot of lost Virgins who lived near Virgin Charlotte Amalie.

It will not be possible to begin organizing and writing the review until I receive the book itself. What better way to wile away the time than by fantasizing about all these lost Virgins?

Gus said he saw parts of the womanuscript, (hereafter called "the Book") and was not impressed. He said one place is the same as another, no diff.
I was a bit disconcerted by his cavalier dismissal of Emmy's Book so to regain my composure I arranged all the perishables in the fridge by their "best before" dates.
Two jars of mango chutney were empty but the dates still had a month to go.

Finally my fantasies got the better of me. What did Charlotte look like? Was she a big busted blonde Amazon? Still a virgin as no man could tame her long enough to bed her?
With some trepidation I decided to search out this Charlotte Amalie if possible.
In this day and age there could only be one Virgin Chalotte Amalie. Gus had said there was and Gus knows his virgins.
So I googled Charlotte Amalie ... virgo intacta. :cry:

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What was I thinking?