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[ 9 blog entries ] |
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 Posted: Mon May 07, 2007 8:45 pm |
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Viewed 179 times
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Posted: Wed Apr 04, 2007 8:54 pm
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THE PHONE CALL
"Hello?"
"Hi honey.
This is Daddy.
Is Mommy near the phone?"
"No Daddy.
She's upstairs in the bedroom
with Uncle Paul."
After a brief pause,
Daddy says,
"But honey,
you haven't got
an Uncle Paul."
"Oh yes I do,
and he's upstairs in the room
with Mommy,
right now."
Brief Pause.
"Uh, okay then,
this is what I want you to do.
Put the phone
down on the table,
run upstairs
and knock on the bedroom door
and shout to Mommy
that Daddy's car
just pulled into the driveway."
"Okay Daddy,
just a minute."
A few minutes later
the little girl comes back to the phone.
"I did it Daddy."
"And what happened honey?"
"Well, Mommy got all scared,
jumped out of bed
with no clothes on
and ran around screaming.
Then she tripped over the rug,
hit her head on the dresser
and now she isn't moving at all!"
"Oh my God!!!
What about your Uncle Paul?"
"He jumped out of the bed
with no clothes on, too.
He was all scared
and he jumped out of the back window
and into the swimming... [ Continued ]
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Viewed 119 times
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Posted: Sat Oct 28, 2006 7:14 am
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Hello, my name is NeatAbuser and I suffer from guilt for not forwarding 50 billion fucking chain letters sent to me by people who actually believe if you send them on, a poor six year old girl in Scotland with a breast on her forehead will be able to raise enough money to have it removed before her redneck parents sell her to a traveling freak show.
And, do you honestly believe that Bill Gates is going to give
you, and everyone to whom you send "his" email, $1000?
How stupid are we?
Ooooh, looky here! If I scroll down this page and make a
wish, I'll get laid by a model I just happen to run into the next
day!
What a bunch of bullshit.
Maybe the evil chain letter leprechauns will come into my
house and sodomize me in my sleep for not continuing a chain letter that was started by St Peter in 5AD and brought to this country by midget pilgrim stowaways on the Endeavour.
Fuck 'em!!
If you're going to forward something, at least send me something mildly amusing.
I've seen all the "send this to 10 of your closest friends,
and this poor, wretched excuse for a human being will somehow
receive a nickel from some omniscient being" forwards about 90
times. I don't fucking care.
Show a little intelligence and think about what you're
actually contributing to by sending out these forwards. Chances are, it's our own unpopularity. The point being?
If you get some chain letter that's threatening to leave you
shagless or luckless for the rest of your life, delete it.
If it's funny, send it on.
Don't piss people off by making them feel guilty about a
leper in Botswana with no teeth who has been tied to the arse of a dead elephant for 27 years and whose only salvation is the 5 cents per letter he'll receive if you forward this email.
Now forward this to everyone you know. Otherwise, tomorrow morning your underwear will turn carnivorous and... [ Continued ]
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