samkorn's blog

A couple of weeks ago, I purchased a glorious-looking hanging basket of yellow, long-stemmed Daisies at the N.D.G., Montreal branch of Reno-Depot, a popular box-hardware chain-store in Quebec. The gardening section clerk suggested that I water my Daisies daily, and hang them in the sun.

So, I drove my Daisies home and began religiously following Reno-Depot's instructions to the letter. To my disappointment and dismay, my beloved Daisies took a downturn for the worst and started drooping from day one.

Nothing I did seemed to make any difference. Alternating them from sun to shade, watering them more or less, whispering soft words of encouragement - my Reno-Depot Daisies had unfortunately already begun to die.

Even though all my other plants, which I had bought elsewhere, were thriving, my Reno-Depot Daisies were deteriorating and dying. By the end of the second week or so, they were deader than a doornail.

Thus, I returned my now-deceased Daisies back to the Reno-Depot store in Notre Dame de Grace for a refund, exchange or credit. Despite a huge "YOUR SATISFACTION IS OUR PRIORITY" sign hanging on the wall at the Customer Service desk, Reno-Depot REFUSED to give me any satisfaction, claiming there was "no damn guarantee" on plants.

Dumbfounded, I tried arguing that I had been duped, deceived, defrauded by those decadent-looking and artificially-virile Daisies. It was all to no avail, NO DEAL, dick, nada! The disinterested and in-different Reno-Depot customer service clerk simply shrugged her shoulders, and nonchalantly walked away.

Looking back now in retrospect, I suspect that my super-Daisies may have originally been "doctored" by the Depot with nitrogen, sheep-shit, or some other kind of plant viagra. However disillusioned, I have learned my lesson well and am determined to NO longer shop at Reno-Depot for my Daisies or other botanical needs in the future.