Diary of a Fool

Today would have been my sons 11 th birthday. Very Sad day indeed

I sit here at my desk at work and type it this - why you ask are you doing this and not your job ? Well I do it because I can"t concentrate on anyone thing for more than 5 minutes these days so I better type fast. I am entering into week 3 of my liquid diet and have lost almost 30 lbs which seems like alot but really isnt when you are up over 400lbs. A few of my friends mostly female have commented that they can see the difference in me already.

My wife and I have started talking and meeting for coffee and are trying to work things out. We are trying to be friends again and it is a start for us. We need to take it slow for it is a long road and we may not reach the end of it together if we start rushing into things. My family has come to town to see that I am still alive and ok they mean well enough but they are now starting to get on my case as only parents can do. THet want me to come down at christmas fine I 'll come. They now have this idea that I should come and live with them and my sister and we can all be a big family again. And I will admit that it has its merit. What about the realationships that I have here with both my wife and a "friend" that I have
am I supposed to throw all of that away? My wife and I may or may not work out our differences and move forward my friend and I are trying to figure out were we stand also and if there may be anything for us. Decisions,Decisions,Decisions what do I do

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Day three of my new lifestyle. It has been 36 hrs since I started on a path to better and healthier living. I haven't had solid food since Tuesday night. I have been on a liquid diet administered by a doctor I did this type of program approx 5 yrs ago and lost 120 lbs over a yr I am hoping to surpass that this time around in a shorter time frame as I really need to drop allot of weight if I am to get living on the surface. After looking around at several different options this was the only one that was really open to me at the time. Banding is another option but not at this time maybe after I drop 50-70 lbs. So it's shake time once again humm chocolate or vanilla yummy

Started a new Lifestyle today. I have not been in the best of health as of late. Started with a new Doctor this week who put me a new diet - liquid shakes I have done them in the past with great sucess I lost 120 lbs. I need to be able to do that again if I am going to continue to life on the surface.