One thing that I have learnt about being harassed is that you teach people how to treat you.
This does not mean if you are being harassed it's your fault or that you did anything wrong, it
does mean that some people have different standards than others and what I now tell people on my
site is how did the behaviour make you feel? That is all that counts.



This advice is for any situation however, if someone is doing something that you deem to be inappropriate, don't just sit there and take it, make sure that they first understand that you
object to the behaviour, there are a maryid of different ways that you can do this, you can mirror back the behaviour, see how they like it. You can go with the direct approach and tell them straight to their face. Write them a note, tell them through a third party, but stop it at the start not at the end.

If you see the person continues with the same type of behaviour that you find to be offensive
then you need to find a way if possible to distance yourself from that person. Harassment does
not get better or improve with time, if anything it's been shown to escalate and that is
something that you do not want to let happen. Some people just have a natural way of being
offensive without realising it, and if that's the case they need to be made to realise this,
however some people actively go out of their way to be offensive and if this is the case then

you also need to address this sort of person appropriately.

I have learnt a lot over the last six or seven years of my harassment, and one of the main
things that I have learnt is to nip things in the bud. I think if I had gone to HR when the
whole harassment thing started, then I could maybe have gotten it stopped. Instead I tried to
ignore it, or tried to just brush it off, or I was just rude back to the people that were
initiating the activities. This might work for a while, but then they will just use this, to
show that you are the trouble maker or the one with the problem, the same things they are doing
to you, when used against them, they will try to use to show you as the aggressor.

The best things to do is to try to be as straight forward as you can with the person and if the
behaviour continues then discontinue association if at all possible, if that fails, try to move
away from the person, but deal with it immediately and deal with it directly.

My sexual harassment at work turned eventually into workplace mobbing, which after awhile made
it impossible to stay within that environment, that problem however was that these people found
their behaviour to be acceptable because it was never appropriately challenged, and thus things
escalated, and from mobbing it turned into what I would years later discover to be gang
stalking. I honestly feel that if I had taken an aggressive stance at the start, no matter what
that aggressive stance might have been, it truly would have saved me years of aggravation.

Anyways hind sight as they say is 20/20. I don't have the benefit of that for now, all I can do

now is take away the knowledge that I have, and use it for future situations when they arrive,

but what I have learnt is that you have control for a limited time, and you have to use that

time to get things back in check as quickly as you can, because once you let things get out of

check, things become unbound very quickly.