Wolf Within

Unless H&R files us as a non profit, we must claim ourselves as a business or partnership - otherwords, donations that have been given, must be claimed by the donor as an "expense" - it's been one dead end after another and I apologize to those who have sponsored us. I don't know what to say except it's been a merry go round and I want off.
Those who have donated may make a claim that they paid us for a service.
The service being that we were paid to foster an animal for adoption or the programs until further notice and the accountant told me this herself.

From one department to the next, there's been mixed messages, a check returned in the society name (that we can't cash until we are registered), taxes returned and redone taking up more time, travel, cost of gas, phone calls on my cell, creating a heap of stress... just a heap of stress!
I can't believe I took out my savings to come out to this county and invested in 2 homes to get taken by such a repressed community.
"Bring your wallet, but leave your goals somewhere else"
"Come if you're retiring, building a house and can support a dying community"
aaaggghhhhhhh! The two faced no good for.....

I'm fed up of trying to please everyone else (per say), it simply hasn't worked. On the contrary, it's been a demanding, manipulated nightmare (ok, i've said it a hundred times) so where to go from here?

Give up? Not an option.
Move? I'm doing whatever I can and I can't believe after all my years, what has happened to my credit since 2005! They screwed me good - something they are obviously good at. I came here with everything and I leave with nothing!

Pursue the Documentary? YES, as soon as I can.
Change the folks around me? YES, too many finger pointers, opinions and no lending a couple of hours to ensure it all works. (Taking time to lend a hand is worth more than a million bucks to someone like me - but it's not what I've received)
Did I have enough money to do this? YES, I did, but the vandalism, lawyers, deaths, opposition, negativity and loss of the houses - were what killed me.
Living in a condemend house without heat or water has cost a bloody fortune and not saved me a copper penny!

How many have had 27 vehicules in their lifetime? (let alone in 2 years) WHO can afford that - and then there was the flat tires..... YES, I had enough to do what I do, how could I have ever anticipated the anguish that was to follow because I went public and put a price tag on the altered and vaccined animals?

Do I need people who share opinions that do not serve the cause? NNNNNOOOOO
Do I need people who haven't the time of day to promote or benefit what we do? Again NO.
Do I need people who think that critters are deserving of life and we don't have a right to take that away? Yes!
Do I need people who come and assist with chores? Yes!
Do I need people who commit that if something should happen and they can't keep the critter, that they'll return it to us? Yes!
Now what's so hard about that? (besides that it isn't complicated at all!)

Do I need to hear that I need someone with "an open wallet"? F*ck NO!
Do I need to obtain a deserved loan after years of building up and doing what I can to consolidate? I don't know too many people who hit the age of 50 and can say that all they owe is $5,000 (give or take a few $$)

Do I need to hear "Do you know WHO I am" and of course my answer to that question is: "You're nobody till I can see that you deserve my respect"

What is wrong with this picture?
(hand waving in the air) I'm around the wrong people.

and to those of you who care about critters and that the couple of us are doing the best we can - i luv u guys!!! Thank you. Thank you, thank you! I hope one day I can do something for you!

We never professed to be a huge org - we never professed to be psychologists, we are a tool, a utility that compliments the benefits that help heal people, that sends an aura of love and makes people feel whole....
I'm off to get the newspaper in case things don't go well at the banks, I don't care if I have to pay 8 or 9% interest on a loan as long as I get one and all I can do is chalk it up to another valuable lesson in life, that has been learned.

Friends? What does that word mean anyway...? It's a question that keeps coming to mind and I'm having a hard time answering it.
huggs to all and have a great thanksgiving eh.