[canuckns]

Ode to SPAM
author unknown

Oh SPAM(tm)! Oh SPAM(tm)! Gourmet delight!
My food by day, my dreams by night.
To carve, to slice, to dice you up -
pureed in a blender and sipped from a cup.

What shining deity from Olympus knelt
down to the earth and hog butt smelt?
Creating then man's eternal desire
for swine entrails congealed by fire.

On some corporate farm, a pig has died.
Eyes, tongue, and snout end up inside
that cube of SPAM(tm) hidden in the can
I now hold in my trembling hand.

More than mere food, SPAM(tm) is for me
a hedonistic expression of gluttonous glee.
Mottled with pork fat, the pink cube engrosses.
My mouth takes it in, my intestine disposes.

Long have my arteries clogged to the sound
of sizzling SPAM(tm) when there's no one around -
furtively chewing or swallowing whole.
Triple bypass by forty, my medical goal.

Other processed meat products I've tried or declined
Vienna Sausages, Treet, even pig's feet in brine.
Though each may be tasty in different ways,
none matches SPAM(tm) for gelatinous glaze.

That glistening pinkness beckons me

with gristle, fat, and BHT.
Oh SPAM(tm), my SPAM(tm) - the taste, the smell!
The sacred meat product, from Hormel.

[-Mario-]

Eh... FB... I found your pills....

[-Mario-]

I disable my setting for the occasion..

[-Mario-]

Dr. Zeuss

[-Mario-]

Spam Police.... She looks like Crysalism...

[-Mario-]

Allll... right.... I'm done if I am to only one playing

[canuckns]

[twister]

TEAM EH the Valiant 300 will Give them NOTHING.. BUT TAKE from them EVERYTHING !!!!!

This Isn't MADNESS... THIS IS THE EH TEAM !!!!!!!!!

[SprCForr]

Be careful, you're messing with a pack of Marooners.




Anyone want some?

[bossdog]

Do what you will with the "shit". Mine takes all!

[SprCForr]

$1:

TEAM EH the Valiant 300 will Give them NOTHING.. BUT TAKE from them EVERYTHING !!!!!

This Isn't MADNESS... THIS IS THE EH TEAM !!!!!!!!!

[bossdog]

[twister]

Hitler eh.. hitler on SPAM.... well the only things I know about Hitler are

(Placing fingers under nose to create fake moustache)..
"He IZ only about Zis tall!"

( Snapping out a Hiel Hitler salute with the other arm)
"And I Zink he' iZ standink over Zere!"

But watch this and you'll understand... better a Mel Brooks classic...

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yu2NqfISm9k[/youtube]

[twister]

AUSTIN, Minnesota (AP) -- It's a lunch meat luau: Spam goes Hawaiian.

Hawaiians, who eat more Spam per person than any other group in the United States, now have a Spam product of their very own.

Austin-based Hormel Foods, which makes the canned lunch meat, has created a special limited edition can available only in the Aloha State.

The Spam Hawaii Collector's Edition will be available in limited quantities later this month in Hawaiian grocery stores.

The can features hula dolls in grass skirts and a recipe for Spam musubi, which consists of a strip of fried Spam wrapped on the outside of a rice ball held in place by dried seaweed.

"Spam has been part of the Hawaiian culture for decades," said Nick Meyer, senior product manager for Hormel Foods.

"The brand is beloved on the islands, so we are pleased to offer this special collector's edition can to Hawaiian customer

[Athena]

wow, this stuff is really creative. I am really digging the spam anthem... that takes dedication