Okay, I'm a very stressed kid. Depression all the bloody time.
How do I get through a lot of these? I do something very Canadian. I write a letter. I don't give them, of course, but it helps me calm down. Simple. But FULL of hate all the time. You think i say fuck to much? You should read my psychopathic hate letters.
Well, my mother found a particularly nasty letter from me to the family....
I referred to her in it as a Neo-Nazi Psychopath, just like her mother (my grandmother), and said multiple times that she is out to depress me.
It was a very extremist letter after she told me to get the fuck out of her face. I was pissed off. I have enough crap at school and really didn't want to deal with anything at home. I want to relax at home.
I rant about the shortage of food in the house, and the fact she wishes to take the internet from me.
I also accused her of viewing me as a low-life. I also noted that I fear a violent reaction from her if she ever stumbled upon the letter.
Well, she found that letter.....
....
And wrote me one back... She handed it to me right after The Leafs game tonight....
This is the letter she wrote me after finding mine on the floor in my room:
My Mother wrote:
To my only son,
I have spent the last 15 years trying to protect you from every bad thing that could happen to you - I can see from your dear family letter how you feel about myself, your grandmother, and your sisters.
I am sorry that you seem to feel the world hates you - because I get frustrated occasionally when no one lifts a finger around here - your right I must be an evil bitch. I never once said you were a low-life - instead I try to build you up telling you how smart, funny + talented you are. As for what you perceive as threats of violence?!?
I HAVE NEVER been violent with you or any of your siblings.
And I am very sorry that you seem to think I spend my days whining + that I pick favorites - I guess making teasing jokes is too much for you - must be part of my Neo Nazi psychopathic personality.
As for the lack of food that you seem to think of as sickening - I happen to spend almost 800 dollars a month on food if you can't manage to find something to eat in all that then you have the problem. You think I want to take away the internet to make you miserable?! I just wan someone to work for something around here. So in short I don't know what you would like to do but I do not think that you should be forced to live with a family you hate.
I love you with all my heart and always have + I don't know how to make anything better for you so you tell me what it is that you want to do.
Your NEO-NAZI Mother
Wow.
I've drinking about 10 cups of coffee because of this new load of stress.
M mother is now convinced that I hate her. I told her that the letters were in spite of the moment and Didn't mean much. She doesn't believe me.
She asked me if I wanted to leave.
Because "I hate the family".
Holy fuck someone, anyone, how the hell do I press rewind? I don't need my mother thinking I hate her and the family. The letter meant nothing and she doesn't believe me.
The letters weren't supposed to be found, but I left them on the floor after cleaning my bed.
I need more coffee. You know how hard it is to watch your mother cry her eyes out and tell you that she has sacrificed so much for you when you meant little?
Oh Christ.
What have I gotten myself into....
I'm such an asshole... I'm such a fucking asshole....
I'm shaking.... I'm surprised I haven't broke down yet. WHERE IS MY REWIND BUTTON?!
CKA Super Elite 
