[xerxes]

I'll admit I was tempted to put this in the Jokes and Humour section because this just made me laugh.

From the ignorant fools at Conservapedia:

Quote:

Liberal bias has become the single biggest distortion in modern Bible translations. There are three sources of errors in conveying biblical meaning:

* lack of precision in the original language, such as terms underdeveloped to convey new concepts introduced by Christ
* lack of precision in modern language
* translation bias in converting the original language to the modern one.

Of these three sources of errors, the last introduces the largest error, and the biggest component of that error is liberal bias. Large reductions in this error can be attained simply by retranslating the KJV into modern English.[1]

As of 2009, there is no fully conservative translation of the Bible which satisfies the following ten guidelines:[2]

1. Framework against Liberal Bias: providing a strong framework that enables a thought-for-thought translation without corruption by liberal bias
2. Not Emasculated: avoiding unisex, "gender inclusive" language, and other modern emasculation of Christianity
3. Not Dumbed Down: not dumbing down the reading level, or diluting the intellectual force and logic of Christianity; the NIV is written at only the 7th grade level[3]
4. Utilize Powerful Conservative Terms: using powerful new conservative terms as they develop;[4] defective translations use the word "comrade" three times as often as "volunteer"; similarly, updating words which have a change in meaning, such as "word", "peace", and "miracle".
5. Combat Harmful Addiction: combating addiction by using modern terms for it, such as "gamble" rather than "cast lots";[5] using modern political terms, such as "register" rather than "enroll" for the census
6. Accept the Logic of Hell: applying logic with its full force and effect, as in not denying or downplaying the very real existence of Hell or the Devil.
7. Express Free Market Parables; explaining the numerous economic parables with their full free-market meaning
8. Exclude Later-Inserted Liberal Passages: excluding the later-inserted liberal passages that are not authentic, such as the adulteress story
9. Credit Open-Mindedness of Disciples: crediting open-mindedness, often found in youngsters like the eyewitnesses Mark and John, the authors of two of the Gospels
10. Prefer Conciseness over Liberal Wordiness: preferring conciseness to the liberal style of high word-to-substance ratio; avoid compound negatives and unnecessary ambiguities; prefer concise, consistent use of the word "Lord" rather than "Jehovah" or "Yahweh" or "Lord God."

Thus, a project has begun among members of Conservapedia to translate the Bible in accordance with these principles. The translated Bible can be found here.

Benefits include:

* mastery of the Bible, which is priceless
* mastery of the English language, which is valuable
* thorough understanding of the differences in Bible translations, particularly the historically important King James Version
* benefiting from activity that no public school would ever allow; a Conservative Bible could become a text for public school courses
* liberals will oppose this effort, but they will have to read the Bible to criticize this, and that will open their minds

How long would this project take? There are about 8000 verses in the New Testament. At a careful rate of translating about four verses an hour, it would take one person 2000 hours, or about one year working full time on the project.

Full article: http://conservapedia.com/Conservative_Bible_Project#Advantages_to_a_Conservative_Bible_Online

Like I said, a giant goddman joke.

There's so much wrong with this idea, I could spend hours shitting all over this project and then Derby could come in and pick up where I left off.

First, aren't the people who actually read Conservapedia without laughing the type who belive that the Bible is the inerrant word of God? If so, then isn't this heresy?

Second, what makes these people think they know better than the various scholars over the centuries who translated the Bible from the actual ancient Hebrew and Greek and not from the poorly translated KJV?

[Pseudonym]

That's really ridiculous. A goodly number of Biblical translations deserve criticism, but this is foolishness. The Bible is not supposed to be translated in accordance with a particular philosophical viewpoint. The ultimate goal in any translation should always be to hold true to the original text.

As a Christian I find the perspective of the quoted material to be extremely troubling.

[commanderkai]

Agreed with Pseudo

Edit: Oops...

[Zipperfish]

That would be "Agreed with Pseudo." Pseudo is awesome, but I still miss Psudo.

[sandorski]

Proof that Ideology is a Blackhole of Stupidity dressed up to look Smart.

Ideology--Use at own risk.

[OldChum]

Hilarious is the thought of Preacher Harper or Ignatieff

[leewgrant]

It read almost as satire - a liberal view of how conservatives might translate the bible.

Quote:

1. Framework against Liberal Bias: providing a strong framework that enables a thought-for-thought translation without corruption by liberal bias
2. Not Emasculated: avoiding unisex, "gender inclusive" language, and other modern emasculation of Christianity
3. Not Dumbed Down: not dumbing down the reading level, or diluting the intellectual force and logic of Christianity; the NIV is written at only the 7th grade level[3]
4. Utilize Powerful Conservative Terms: using powerful new conservative terms as they develop;[4] defective translations use the word "comrade" three times as often as "volunteer"; similarly, updating words which have a change in meaning, such as "word", "peace", and "miracle".
5. Combat Harmful Addiction: combating addiction by using modern terms for it, such as "gamble" rather than "cast lots";[5] using modern political terms, such as "register" rather than "enroll" for the census
6. Accept the Logic of Hell: applying logic with its full force and effect, as in not denying or downplaying the very real existence of Hell or the Devil.
7. Express Free Market Parables; explaining the numerous economic parables with their full free-market meaning
8. Exclude Later-Inserted Liberal Passages: excluding the later-inserted liberal passages that are not authentic, such as the adulteress story
9. Credit Open-Mindedness of Disciples: crediting open-mindedness, often found in youngsters like the eyewitnesses Mark and John, the authors of two of the Gospels
10. Prefer Conciseness over Liberal Wordiness: preferring conciseness to the liberal style of high word-to-substance ratio; avoid compound negatives and unnecessary ambiguities; prefer concise, consistent use of the word "Lord" rather than "Jehovah" or "Yahweh" or "Lord God."

[Napur]

I'm not sure that this is satirical. Beyond that, though, Martin Luther altered the Bible to reflect what he wanted it to say. There is historical precedent there. That's part of the reason that the Protestant Bible is different from the Catholic and Eastern Orthodox Bible. I find the whole project troubling on a certain level, but it isn't going to change anyone's mind about anything. If it makes them feel better about what they already believe, that's not such a big deal. The ironic thing to me is that they begin with the idea that the current translations have a liberal bias and then set out not for authenticity, but to create a Bible filled with conservative propaganda. C'est la vie.

[Dayseed]

Napur wrote:

I'm not sure that this is satirical. Beyond that, though, Martin Luther altered the Bible to reflect what he wanted it to say. There is historical precedent there. That's part of the reason that the Protestant Bible is different from the Catholic and Eastern Orthodox Bible. I find the whole project troubling on a certain level, but it isn't going to change anyone's mind about anything. If it makes them feel better about what they already believe, that's not such a big deal. The ironic thing to me is that they begin with the idea that the current translations have a liberal bias and then set out not for authenticity, but to create a Bible filled with conservative propaganda. C'est la vie.

Well, that was a good first post!

[sandorski]

Blessed are the Tax Cutters, for them the Blessings of Heaven shall trickle down.

[Psudo]

The most conservative English translation of the Bible would be to use Tyndale's translation whenever possible and KJV for the parts Tyndale never finished. The most conservative possible translation is the read the original Greek and Hebrew.

I guess I'm on a moderate conservative, then. I typically read the KJV.

P.S. It's nice to be missed.