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- The New Hockey Player -
Category: Canadian Jokes/Canadian Identity Jokes

From: IkeaMan
Author: Unknown
Added: January 15, 2006
Modified: January 15, 2006
Views: 11497
Votes: 11
Rating: 3.18

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The New Hockey Player:

Toronto coach Pat Quinn sends scouts out around the world looking for a new centre to hopefully help win the Stanley Cup for Toronto.

One of his scouts informs him of a young Iraqi centre who he thinks will turn out to be a true superstar. So, Pat flies to Iraq to watch him play and is suitably impressed and arranges for him to come over to the NHL.

Two weeks later,Toronto is down 4-0 at home against Montreal with only 8 minutes left. Pat gives the young Iraqi centre the nod to go on, and he puts him on in place of Sundin.

The lad is a sensation, scores 5 goals in 8 minutes and wins the game for Toronto. The fans are delighted, the players and coaches are delighted and the media love the new star.

When he comes off the ice, he phones his Mum to tell her about his first day in the NHL. "Hi Mum, guess what?" he says. "I played for 8 minutes today, we were down 4-0 but I scored 5 goals and we won. Everybody loves me; the fans, the players and the media, they all love me".

"Great," says his Mum, "let me tell you about my day. Your father got shot in the street, your sister and I were raped and beaten and your brother has joined a gang of looters, while you were having a great time".

The young lad is very upset. "What can I say, Mum, I'm so sorry".

"Sorry!" says his Mum, "It's your damned fault that we moved to Toronto in the first place!"

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