[rearguard]

<strong>Written By:</strong> rearguard
<strong>Date:</strong> 2006-08-10 13:24:42
<a href="/article/131842992-tips-for-travellers">Article Link</a>

The exceptions:

* Baby formula.
* Breast milk in bottles.
* Juice for a baby or small child.
* Prescription medicine with a name that matches the passenger's ticket.
* Insulin.
* Essential non-prescription medicine.

Put all liquids and gels in checked baggage.

If you're boarding a flight to the United States, you'll be asked to take off your shoes for screening.

If you can't take off your shoes because you have a disability or are elderly, security officials will check them with detection equipment.

Source link:
<a href="http://www.cbc.ca/story/world/national/2006/08/10/bombing-aircraft.html">http://www.cbc.ca/story/world/national/2006/08/10/bombing-aircraft.html</a>

Rearguard writes:

Um, no liquids, but what about solids? For example, you can still slip a bomb inside your mother's homemade doughnuts. Hell, why not ingest a bomb wrapped inside a condom and just walk on board, or perhaps have your spleen removed and replaced by a homemade bomb?

In consideration of these new and dangerous possibilities, soon you'll have to remove all your clothes for inspection and in some cases submit to a full body x-ray scan, and you won't be allowed to use the bathroom on any flight, including international flights, unless you are medically proven to be incontinent. You'll be responsible to bring your own diapers, unless you are flying first class, in which case diapers are supplied on demand. No carry-on baggage will be allowed, unless it contains essential medical supplies. all passengers will be required to board the planes fully naked and handcuffed - NO exceptions allowed. Finally, all passengers, except infants and the elderly, will be required to remain seated and locked in place using newly installed security restraints. An extra $2,000 security fee + GST will be required on each ticket purchase.

Oh, and anyone who did not fill out a census form will NOT be allowed to fly - period.

They obviously hate us for our freedoms, that much is very clear, which is why the Canadian government continues to assist the US and its War on Terror by bombing primarily Muslim nations with strategic potential, mostly oil- and gas-related. The Canadian government also stands by Israel's attack on the people of Lebanon, because, because, ... well because it's Israel dammit!

The Canadian government will continue to work hard to ensure that all Canadians can continue to travel freely and safely until the War is won - have a nice day

PS: We don't give a s#*t about cruise ships, buses, trains, shopping centers, and so on, because everyone knows that terrorists only attack passenger airplanes, with the odd pasenger train here and there . . . but who cares.








[Proofreader's note: this article was edited for spelling and typos on August 11, 2006]

[wasjod]

rearguard,


I think you are wrong about the strip searching, only the really hot looking people will be stripped searched and customs officials will take pictures to insure they are in the database. My money is on the next "plot," being one in which the so called "terrorists," have put mini-bombs in suppositories and then shoved them up their arse. People will be randomly pulled out of line for an anal cavity search. Just make sure you have the runs and then let er rip all over the customs official. I wonder what the fear mongering will look like when the US decides to drop a few nukes?

---
My freedom is more important than your great idea.
– Anonymous

[anarcho]

Now skin cream. This is bloody insane. People should gather in front of airports with leaflets explaining that all the misery they have to go through travelling these days is a result of US government policies in the Middle East. No US medling = no terrorist threat! If you want to stop terrorism leave the Middle East alone, not make life miserable for the average person.

[darnation]

And make sure you leave your leaf blowers at home.<br />
<br />
Don't bring your leaf blowers.<br />
<br />
In case you wanted to do some leaf blowing, somewhere else.<br />
<br />
No leaf blowing.<br />
<br />
Yup, it's on the list.<br />
<br />
Damn the nation,<br />
Darnation<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.rantada.wordpress.com">www.rantada.wordpress.com</a><p>---<br>**<br />
<br />
You are your own country, my people, and look what you've become.<br />
<br />
Barrie Nichol, poet<br />
<br />
**

[Jacob]

I think the Americans are very jealous that Scotland Yard was able to be pro-active and arrest people prior to any occurence, while nothing of the kind happened prior to 9/11 (discounting of course the theory that the US Government was inside that specific plot.)

But is was perfect timing because a new movie was released.

[Dr Caleb]

I think you got your URL's crossed with Troy-bilt.

---
"I think it's important to always carry enough technology to restart civilization, should it be necessary." Mark Tilden

[Reader11722]

Bring a cell phone that does not have Verizon, Sprint or AT&T as a carrier or they will provide complete recordings of all your calls to Dept. of Homeland Security.<br />
<br />
Bring your own copy of the book "America Deceived" by E.A. Blayre III because the gov't pressured it off Amazon and other book outlets (even Wikipedia caved). It can be found on Google Books here: <br />
<a href="http://www.iuniverse.com/bookstore/book_detail.asp?&isbn=0-595-38523-0">http://www.iuniverse.com/bookstore/book_detail.asp?&isbn=0-595-38523-0</a><br />
<br />
Also, don't be Muslim or you'll be sent directly to Gitmo or shot.<br />
Hope these tips helped.<br />
Your American friend.<br />

[Spud]

Not true Reader 11722!Contacted iuniverse.Book is not carried by Amazon because it is a print on demand book.I have a copy.
Have not had a chance to read it yet.There is no pressure by anyone to stop printing or selling the book.